The
"B" Bee
by
Neil Milan
The following
is an excerpt from a newsletter titled The "B" Bee,
written as part of a project to demonstrate page layout techniques for printed
materials. The article was just too funny to leave it at that, however,
so it is now posted here.
Tourism
Down in Second Floor, Residents Worry
By Chester Wiles
Staff Writer
In
an effort to revive interest in visiting the second floor of the
building, the floor's residents are offering bigger bargains
and incentives than they ever expected to allow. Still, they worry
that even these measures will not be enough to save their slumping
tourist industry.
"It's gotten to the point where
we have to literally invite people to come down and visit us,"
laments Kat Chen, the lone resident of Rm. 215. "Even [my boyfriend]
Mike won't come by except to see me or use the bathroom."
Though the second floor still draws the
male crowd because of its bathroom monopoly, the days of informal
meetings in the halls, streams of passers by, and crowds gathered
around doorways are almost forgotten. When asked how and why this
happened, most residents appear dumbfounded at best.
Eric Jung, resident
of Rm. 222, is unsure of what the future holds for him and his floor.
"Yeah, it's bad, but I'm
like whatever," says Eric Jung of Rm. 222 in his usual candid
manner. Leslie Lane of Rm. 212 offers an explanation, "I think
the novelty of walking through the building and visiting people
has worn off. We now just kinda stick with certain groups."
Whatever the reason may be, it is clear
that some residents are tired of waiting for the situation to get
better. Many have started actively looking for ways to attract more
visitors. The famous Quad (Rm. 216) now actively solicits people
to come and watch the gaming that goes on between any one of their
four systems. And, when they aren't being used, they even invite
people to give them a try. "Well, I brought these [games] mainly
for myself," confesses Jorge Medina, "but I think it's
cool that other people want to use them too. I mean, gaming is therapeutic."
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